Feedback in professional settings can be tricky. When you’re giving feedback, it’s easy to worry about how to deliver it in a tactful, inoffensive way that still results in change – especially because if you sugarcoat the message, it might not get taken as seriously as it should.
And when you’re receiving feedback, it can be difficult to use it in the right way and not get personally offended by the message.
In this article, we’re taking a look at the key considerations both when giving and receiving feedback to help you feel confident regardless of which side of the situation you’re in.
Why is Feedback Important?
In a professional setting, feedback is especially important for a number of reasons. Giving and receiving feedback allows you to:
- Identify areas which need improving, areas which you might not have realised otherwise
- Create a continuous learning loop, where you can iterate and improve your skills over time
- Quantify hard to measure areas such as presentation skills, performance in a team and behaviour
- Give people an opportunity to ask for help if they are performing badly in an area, this is particularly true when receiving feedback from your manager
Feedback is a powerful process but needs to be handled carefully to have the best results.
Guide For Giving Feedback
If you are giving feedback, it needs to:
1. Be specific
To be useful for development you need clear guidance. Often people say things like “you could be a bit more welcoming”. How does this translate into an action? More specific would be “I would have liked it if you had smiled when you welcomed us”.
2. Give evidence
You will be more likely to change your behaviour if you can identify precise aspects of it. Being reminded of the actual words you said or movements you made will make the feedback more effective.
So if your colleague says, “I thought you were a bit aggressive” this is not as clear as “you leant forward and pointed your finger at me when you said ‘I need to see results’ and that was quite aggressive”.
3. Describe any emotional impact
If you are working with a colleague either making a presentation or role-playing a situation, it will be useful for you to know what the impact of your behaviour is on them. “I felt included”, “I felt reassured” and other statements will help you know you are getting the effect you want.
4. Focus on being constructive
When giving feedback you must always balance what you want to say with what you feel will be useful. Restrict your feedback to three positive points and maybe one or two points for development. There are only so many things you can work on at the same time and it can affect motivation if you receive a list of “negatives”.
5. Use ‘I’ statements
Try and give feedback from your perspective. This way you avoid labelling the person and it remains your opinion. Say, “I felt that you rushed the part when you explained how the product is used by customers”, instead of “You rushed how your product is being used by customers”.
6. Prioritise areas to focus on
Adults can only focus on and work on a few concepts at a time. Discuss with the participant if there are areas in particular they want feedback on, such as hesitation words or pace of voice for a presentation. This will help you focus in on those areas when providing feedback.
7. Align with goals
Often the feedback that people give is based on the giver’s personal beliefs or preferences, and yet the most useful feedback starts with an understanding of what their goals and objectives are, for example, why are they giving this presentation?
When a feedback giver says “Her jokes were very funny” what they are usually saying is “Her sense of humour matches mine so I enjoy it.” Talk with the participant about their goals to help guide your feedback and give you areas to focus on.
How to Practice Giving Feedback
Tackling any situation without having practiced it is difficult, and giving feedback is no different. Delivering feedback tactfully and effectively is a skill like any other, which can be improved through practice and repetition.
There are some ways to practice and improve your feedback delivery skills without the pressure of a real situation.
Immersive Learning Apps
Platforms like VirtualSpeech allow you to practice giving both positive and negative feedback to an AI-powered avatar in realistic roleplays. This means you can practice your delivery in a safe environment, where you’re free to make mistakes without consequences.
VirtualSpeech provides its own feedback on your roleplay performance, helping you understand what you’re doing well and what needs improvement. You can practice as many times as you want, so that when the real-life moment comes, you feel ready and confident.
Practice With Family or Friends
Part of the challenge of giving feedback comes from the fact that it’s not totally in your control. Your actions can influence, but not fully determine, how the other person responds.
Firstly, practicing conversations ahead of time with family or friends can help you feel confident in your ‘script’. Secondly, the people close to you can put themselves in the feedback receiver’s shoes and let you know if anything you said could be construed as offensive or rude.
Having talked through it with others will help you feel more confident when the real moment arrives.
Online Resources
Giving feedback is a skill like any other, and that means there are tried-and-tested techniques and best practices you can learn. Conversation and workplace experts regularly share advice and tips on how to best give feedback, and you can find these on platforms like YouTube.
Famous public speakers such as Simon Sinek and Vinh Giang, and organizations like TED, regularly share videos in which they explain how you can improve your feedback delivery skills.
These videos are well worth watching in order to give yourself a theoretical understanding that you can bring to practice and real-life situations.
Guide For Receiving Feedback
If you are receiving feedback, remember:
1. Feedback is impersonal
The feedback given by the observer should be on what they saw in that moment of your behaviour. This is not a comment on you as a person nor is there an implication that you exhibit this behaviour all the time. It is what the observer saw now.
2. Listen and don’t interrupt
Try not to interrupt, contest or explain while you are receiving feedback. Listen with an open mind and make notes of what is said. You may then review and clarify what has been observed. Remember, you may not think you were being evasive, manipulative etc but this may be the effect of your behaviour.
3. Get feedback from junior people
Senior people need to get coaching from junior people
Robert Steven Kaplan explaining the importance of senior people within an organisation getting feedback and coaching from junior people, who know their faults and what they should improve.
Watch the full video here: What To Ask The Person In The Mirror
4. Put it into action
You must turn the feedback into positive action on your part. Think about what you will change as a result of the feedback you have received. If possible act on it straight away by trying the same situation or presentation again.
5. Follow up
The whole purpose of feedback is to improve performance. You need to measure whether or not that is happening and then make adjustments as you go. It’s a good ideas to use the same person or group of people to practice with, as they’ll be able to tell you what is working and what needs to be modified. Keep a document of your conversations and discuss changes with them.
Wrapping Up
Giving and receiving feedback isn’t as straightforward as it seems, but as we’ve seen there are several techniques you can apply to help you deliver and receive feedback effectively – a key skill in the modern workplace.
For giving feedback, remember to:
- Be specific
- Give evidence
- Focus on being constructive
- Prioritize areas to focus on
And when receiving feedback, try to:
- Not take it personally
- Not interrupt the person giving feedback
- Put it into action
- Follow up and see if you’ve applied it correctly
Keep these tips in mind, practice applying them in real situations, and you’ll be well on your way to being a great communicator of feedback.
